Undoubtedly, you’ll have your hands full every morning once you become a single dad. You’ll effectively be the project manager of your kids. Getting them out of bed, getting them dressed and fed! Simultaneously, their lunches will need packing and then it’s time to rush towards the bus stop in time for school.
Only a fraction of the male population are single dads. And it ain’t easy. If we think about it as a fraction, you’re literally doing double the work when you don’t have a spouse to help out.
Sometimes it might be a blessing. Sometimes, it can understandably be super difficult. Especially when your child is sick and you have to go to work. If you’re sick, you might get a day off work, but do you get a day off being a single dad?
The challenge of raising kids as a single parent never gets easier. So, you’ve to prepare yourself for the change. There are many things that you’ve to control and learn to be someone that your children are proud of.
If you have a son, you’ve to deal with him in a different way and raising a daughter is a different story altogether. You’ve got to deal with both of them in a different manner which is not easy, but it’s not something impossible to do.
Raising A Son As A Single Father
Generally, public perception of a father-son relationship is direct and action-oriented, compared to mother-son relations. It’s often said that sons get their sense of humour from their fathers. Humour can often serve, for us all, as a defence against difficult emotions.
But what every father wants is a good life for his children. And every father will also have a set of standards that one day he wishes his son to live by.
We’re not here to tell you whether you’re good at parenting or not. But we do understand the difficulty of raising a child on your own, and everyone needs a helping hand every now and then.
So why not take some advice from us, and have that shoulder to lean on?
- The most important thing that kids need while growing up is your time. Mind you, the amount of time is not what you’d be looking at here but the quality of time you spend with him is more important. Spend as much time as possible with them and come up with activities you both can do together.
- Help him understand how you think, how you deal with problems, life’s stresses, and strains. These little practices will help him learn how to stand up and be confident. As the father, you’re the gateway for your child into an adult’s world, so it’s important to teach him about your passions. You have the opportunity to be his greatest teacher, so make the most of it.
- Teach your son that it’s okay to make mistakes and apologise for it. It will strengthen your bond with him and teach him an invaluable lesson about humility.
Being a single father to a son is one of the greatest accomplishments of your life. Share the joys of fatherhood with him, so he can become a great human being and a great father too in the future.
Raising A Daughter As A Single Father
Raising a daughter on your own comes with its own set of challenges, just like raising a son on your own. A lot of attention, caring, and adjusting will be a part of your plan when taking care of your daughter.
Take the following points into consideration when raising a daughter as a single dad.
- Ask for help from a female mentor, your grandmother, aunt or a babysitter. There are some things that girls are comfortable discussing with their mothers only. So get some female perspective in there for all the topics you might be comfortable discussing with them, but they might not feel likewise!
- Have an open and honest relationship with your daughter. Listen to what she’s got to say first and then offer your suggestions. Allow her to take your advice and give her the space to make the best possible decision she can. She needs your unwavering support, so make sure that you’re there for her.
- It is very natural for a father to rescue his daughter from anything that could harm her. But this will never help her learn to do things on her own. So give her your guidance but don’t meddle, let her work things out on her own. Guide her, listen to her, and let her know that you love and support her. But, make sure that you raise her to be a strong young woman who knows how to deal with life.
- Asking your daughter about her day is not enough, you have to involve yourself in her life and listen to her. The more you strive to be a part of your little girl’s life, the better your relationship will be.
Raising a daughter as a single dad can be an overwhelming experience. But, in the end you will be proud of yourself for raising such a fine young woman!
Guide To Ace Being The Perfect Single Dad
At first, becoming a single dad seems almost too daunting and can make you anxious. But this anxiety can be defeated if you learn from people who have already been down the same road.
There are some key factors which you have to consider to ace at being the perfect single dad.
Mentioned below are some points which you can equip yourself with to be the perfect single dad.
- Organise Yourself: One of the major challenges that you’ll face as a single dad is setting up new routines. You’ve to master the art of being organised at all times – be it finding time to go grocery shopping or staying on top of the chores at home. The more organised your routine is, the more work you can get done in a day.
- Know That You’re Not Alone: There are many single parents out there and you can connect with them to see how they are faring with their kids. Being responsible for your children is no cakewalk. At times, you may even find yourself stuck. It’s important to realise that there’s no such thing as a perfect dad. The decisions you make as a single dad can affect everything forever with your children. So you have to be strong, reliable, solid and ever present.
- Patience Is An Asset: One of the major things that you have to achieve being a single dad is patience. Your children are the apple of your eyes. At times you will be surprised at the lengths that you’re willing to go to bring a smile on their lovely faces!
- Allow For Ongoing Grieving: The reason why you and your partner parted ways could be anything. Grieving and healing is a process that occurs over time and your kids need that at times like these. So, give space to your kids to grieve at every stage of their development. It doesn’t matter how long you’ve been single. As your kids get older they will need to process it differently and at different stages of maturity. It’s easy to assume that as you’ve moved on, your children will do the same too. But kids deal with such matters at their own pace, so it’s important for you to recognise it. Talk to your kids about it and when they feel like talking to you about it, know that you’ve hit a major milestone.
- Learn To Love The Kitchen: When it comes to food, you would want to give your children a healthy and balanced diet. But this doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t let them have that occasional burger and fries. Know that you wouldn’t want to spend time with your kids at the dentist or the obesity clinic and you will be fine! Find about foods that are good for your children’s health. A wholesome diet will nourish them well and improve their immune system.
- Love And Accept Unconditionally: One of the best things that a father can do for his children is to love and accept them for who they are. Look them in the eye and tell them you love them. They need to hear it from you and they need the reassurance that their dad’s got their back.
- Understand Your Role As A Single Dad: As your kids mature, they will try to figure out who they are as a person. As they hit puberty, what their friends think of them will begin to hold more weight than what you taught them. So it’s necessary for you to know who your kids hang out with. In short, you’ve have to realise that your role as their dad will change and they might not need you as much as they did before.
Your kids will have enough friends once they become teenagers. But they’ve got their old man to count on both as a father and as their friend. Surprise them with breakfast in bed, give them gifts, be there for their recitals and football matches, go shopping with them and teach them good manners. That’s what dads are for!